


Elevator To The Moon (A Little Out Of Reach)

by waterofthemoon



Category: Doctor Who (2005), Torchwood
Genre: Angst, Episode: s03 - Children of Earth Arc, Episode: s04e12 The Stolen Earth, Episode: s04e13 Journey's End, Grief, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-19
Updated: 2009-12-19
Packaged: 2017-10-09 01:35:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/81560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waterofthemoon/pseuds/waterofthemoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>They don't talk about the people they've lost.</i> Jack runs away, and the Doctor comes to find him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Elevator To The Moon (A Little Out Of Reach)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [celtic_cookie](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=celtic_cookie).



> Takes place after Children Of Earth but before The Waters Of Mars. Written for, because of, and with the help and inspiration of [**celtic_cookie**](http://celtic-cookie.livejournal.com/profile) because she's amazing. My first foray into Whoniverse fic! Thanks so much to [**sophie_448**](http://sophie-448.livejournal.com/profile) for the brilliant beta that made me think.

When Jack hears the TARDIS engines behind him, he thinks he's hallucinating. It wouldn't be the first time since—_since_. Not even the first time that wasn't under the influence of some alien drug, but he whips around anyway, and there she is, beautiful and shabby and blue.

Then the door opens, and the Doctor steps out onto the hard-packed sand. He looks the same as he did the last time Jack saw him, maybe a little worse for wear. Jack doesn't think it's been that long for him. He wonders what happened to Donna.

"Doctor! Should've known I couldn't hide from you." He claps the Doctor on the shoulder, grinning so his face hurts.

The Doctor's silent for a minute. "What are you doing, Jack," he says. It's not a question.

"Are you kidding me? This place is great." He spreads his arms wide to encompass the space, then lets them fall to his sides. "C'mon, I'll introduce you to the locals."

The Doctor gives him that long look that makes Jack feel like he can read his soul, but then he just nods. "Right, then. On we go!"

*

They end up in a pub, a place Jack has stumbled into a few times since he got here. It's not exactly high class, but the food's good, and the company's usually entertaining at the least.

The Doctor doesn't seem to mind. He seems utterly charmed in his way, greeting strangers and prodding at odd fixtures in the decor. Jack finds them a table in the back, then shoulders his way back through the crowd.

By the time he gets back with two mugs of what passes for beer in this galaxy, the Doctor's gathered a small group of locals around him. It's a scene Jack's gotten used to seeing—the Doctor makes friends and enemies wherever he goes—and they don't get a lot of strangers in this place besides. Hell, they're still getting used to Jack.

Jack sets down the drinks, then grabs a chair from a nearby table and sits down next to the Doctor, who looks almost surprised to see him. "Oh, Jack, hello! Have you met Alrami? Well, I mean, I assume you're met almost everyone in here, being a regular and, well, you, and when did you start drinking again?"

"People change. Hello." Jack nods awkwardly in the direction of the girl he takes to be Alrami. He knows most of these people in passing, but he doesn't spend a lot of time talking to strangers, not anymore. They're decent folks, though, no one he needs to keep an eye on.

Once Jack's settled, the Doctor carries on with his conversations. Jack lets himself be caught up in the rhythm of it, the Doctor's rambling a soothing constant. The Doctor listens to everyone, but he pays the most attention to Jack, quirking his eyebrow at something particularly amusing or grabbing his arm to make a point. It's kind of nice, having someone be that attentive to him again.

"Getting kind of crowded," Jack yells in the Doctor's ear after a while. "You wanna get out of here?"

The Doctor grabs his hand, and for a moment, it's just like old times. "Where to?"

*

They don't talk about the people they've lost. Rose and Donna and Gallifrey and a hundred thousand million innocent people the Doctor couldn't save over the centuries, Ianto and Toshiko and Owen and Suzie and Gray and Steven and a pounding litany of names that keeps Jack up at night—the Doctor knows even better than Jack does that missing people too much leads to consequences, rash decisions, and getting anonymously drunk and maudlin in foreign bars. Better to honor their memories by moving forward and being the man they helped him become.

He just wishes he could live up to that.

He doesn't bring up the 456, either. The Doctor already knows, or he wouldn't be here. It's not the Doctor's fault that Jack had to make sacrifices to atone for his past or that the governments of Earth chose to exercise free will the way they did.

Instead, they go down to the beach and talk about places they've been, people they've met, philosophical questions of the universe, anything to avoid the subject. Jack tells him about Gwen's baby, a tiny spark of life and hope in the world, which prompts the Doctor to tell him about having to put a stop to Sarah Jane's wedding. It's a good night, and Jack's grateful to him.

Jack kisses the Doctor that night, hard and messy under the twin moonlight, and the Doctor doesn't push him away. He just lets Jack take what he needs, and then he holds Jack fiercely until Jack's tears subside.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs, clutching at Jack like maybe the Doctor thinks one of them might fly apart if he doesn't hold on tight. "I'm so, so sorry."

Later, as they're walking back up to the town to turn in for the night, Jack says, "I loved him." He smiles a little. "I knew he was special from the first time I met him. Everyone thought I was just messing around with the tea boy, but I—he made me want to be better. Gave me a reason to want to keep living." He looks directly at the Doctor and ignores the way the man has trouble meeting his eyes. "Like you always did."

"Jack." There's sadness in that single syllable, and Jack presses on.

"I'm not asking for anything," he says. "Don't get me wrong; it's not like you don't tempt me in those pinstriped trousers." The Doctor lets out an amused snort. "I just—thought you should know."

The Doctor nudges Jack with his shoulder as they approach the inn. "Still glad I plucked you off that Chula ship?"

"Every day," Jack says sincerely, without hesitation. "Even when everything was going to shit, even when I wished I was still mortal, I was glad to have met you."

"You always were a charmer," the Doctor says. "To tell the truth, I quite miss having you around to stroke my ego." He pats Jack's hand. "Goodnight, Jack."

Jack watches him go into his room and shut the door. He does the same, and for once, he doesn't have trouble sleeping.

*

Jack's gotten into the habit of running in the mornings. It keeps him fit now that he's not chasing weevils or trying to stop the end of the world on a weekly basis, but more importantly, if he runs far and long enough, it wears him out so that he doesn't have the energy to dwell. He likes to see how far he can get before he's doubled over, gasping for breath in the thinner air of this planet.

When he gets back this morning—two and a half times around the outskirts of the sprawling town, not bad—the Doctor's waiting for him in his room. It was locked, of course, but Jack learned a long time ago that a locked door doesn't mean much to a Time Lord. He looks askance at Jack's sweaty t-shirt and matted down hair. "Tea?" he offers mildly.

Jack takes the mug from his hand and sips from it, feeling his eyes widen. Somehow, the Doctor has managed to brew honest-to-God English breakfast tea on a planet that has probably never even heard the word. He suspects the TARDIS is involved. "Where did you find—"

The Doctor shakes his head. "Oh, come on, now. Let an old man have his secrets." He pauses. "All right, Martha gave it to me, last time I saw her. She informed me that it wasn't civilized to go running about the universe and towing planets and all without ever sitting down with a good cup of tea."

Jack laughs and takes another long drink. "That's Martha, all right. She has good taste, I'll give her that."

"Yeah." The Doctor absently stirs his tea with the sonic screwdriver. The gesture is just so very _him_ that it makes Jack's insides clench a little. "So what do you lot do around here?"

Jack shrugs. "It's mainly a farming planet, if you can believe that." He points out the window. "They grow all the crops in the big greenhouses over there. It's kind of ingenious, actually. You'd like it."

The Doctor bounces to his feet. "Well, then, lead the way!"

"Let me just clean up first." He grabs his clothes off the chair and ducks into the tiny bathroom attached to his room, grinning in spite of himself.

*

When they get to the greenhouses, the Doctor starts bouncing all over the place with his glasses on and talking as fast as possible to the farmers, a motley crew of mostly humanoid men and women.

A few of them take him on a tour and proudly show off the advances in technology they've made. Jack, who's been on the tour, trails along behind and smiles fondly when the Doctor whips out the sonic screwdriver to fix a junction of leaking pipes and then shows them how they can improve their technological infrastructure.

"Can't resist helping, can you?" he murmurs when they've been left alone again.

"What?" the Doctor says. "They were going to figure it out eventually. I was just... speeding things along. That's what I do; I help people."

"Thought you weren't supposed to interfere," Jack says, half teasing, half wondering if he should be concerned. Under the surface, this Doctor is so different from the man who brought the Earth home a year ago.

The Doctor exhales. "Look, have you seen this?" He drags Jack over to a row of violently purple hybrid vegetables the farmers are developing. "Look at that, it's brilliant! 'Course, it never catches on, but this one over _here_, on the other hand..."

Jack lets him change the subject. The Doctor's not the only one who's different now.

*

Eventually, the two of them walk back through the desert to where the TARDIS is parked. They stand outside for a minute in silence.

"Well, I guess this is _au revoir_," Jack says, feeling stiff and awkward. "See you around, and all that."

"Come with me." The Doctor extends a hand. "I could use someone to talk to. Well, besides myself."

Jack shakes his head. "Sorry, Doc. Gotta do this one on my own," he says. "I'm retired from saving the universe, remember?"

It's funny—a few years ago, he would have given anything to travel with the Doctor again, even deserted his team once just to follow the TARDIS to the end of the universe. He knows what it is to be responsible now, though, and he won't willingly put that burden on anyone else.

"You can't hide forever, you know that?" The Doctor taps the door of the TARDIS. "I've tried that. Doesn't work. There are still people who need you."

To his surprise, the Doctor leans in and kisses his forehead. It feels like a benediction, like absolution—like something Jack used to do for his team, and like nothing he deserves, but he clings to it anyway.

"I know." Jack nods when the Doctor pulls away.

"You're a good man," the Doctor says. "A bit unnatural, maybe, but an important man. Don't lose sight of that."

"I won't. I promise. I just need time."

The Doctor smiles crookedly. "One of the upsides to your condition, I imagine. We'll meet again, Jack." He steps inside the TARDIS and shuts the door.

Jack's coat whips around his legs as the TARDIS's engines start up, but he doesn't stop watching until after she's completely faded and gone. Then he turns and walks back towards the town. If he's going to go back to doing his duty, he needs a stiff drink. It'll be the last one for a while.


End file.
